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I can’t explain this very well but I’ll do my best.
I was at work Saturday night and everything was normal, until I started having what seemed like an anxiety attack. So I told my boss I had to go to the bathroom and sat in the stall for a little. Then I couldn’t breathe out of rhythm or else my ears would explode with pain. That’s when things get a little blurry, next I remember I was sitting in the corner of the stall crying. I am not sure why I was really crying it was just happening. I couldn’t comprehend anything I didn’t know where I was, who I was, what I was doing and why I was there. I didn’t understand how to move although my vision was shaking, I couldn’t make a noise and I couldn’t hear any noise other than the explosions of pain in my ears. I also vaguely remember saying things to myself trying to get me through it and also things like “I’m going to die here”. Everything goes blurry again. Next thing I know I’m standing at the bathroom sink washing my face off, and everything seemed as normal as normal gets. What happened to me? Should I seek any help? Will it happen again, that’s the most terrifying question because that was honestly the scariest thing that’s ever happened to me. I’m fine now I suppose. Someone please help me.
Additional Details
I’m not going to shoot down any ideas here because they are all very helpful. I’m only 18 and things do get stressful at times but it was probably my easiest night at work until after that, and well I haven’t been really that stressed out lately, I’ve been more apathetic then anything. A repressed memory is a possibility, and so is an anxiety disorder. I want to go talk to someone but my parents don’t have the money and I sure as hell don’t so I don’t know what to do there. That and I don’t want someone to tell me I’m crazy that would make things worse if they should even be considered bad in the first place. The biggest thing is I hate drugs, especially pharmaceuticals. Anything that makes me feel even slightly like I need it to be in control or even help control myself I don’t like the idea of it, but that’s because of a childhood issue with ritalin that lead to me feeling like I was different and also anorexia. So that’s something completely unrelated.
Best Answe
what happened to you sounds a lot like a panic attack. Panic attacks are triggered by the accumulation of anxiety. Anxious thoughts cause the body to “act” as if something dangerous is about to happen. So, naturally the body prepares to fight. This somatic response is very useful when a real danger is present of course. But when the danger is not real, but only a perception, a thought, the body won’t fight, yet all the system remains activated and therefore you feel all these strange somatic sensations that you don’t know where to attribute. And because the symptoms are somatic, ie ears, chocking sensations, dizziness, nausea, tingling in your extremities, etc etc. your natural response is “i’m going to die”.
Good news, nobody ever died of a panic attack.
Bad news, panic attacks are traumatic experiences and this characteristic forces the person to start taking safety measures out of fear that it will happen again (avoidance of certain people/places/situations that have been associated with the occurrence of the panic attack). This avoidance response is unfortunately what makes the situation worse, what maintains the problem.
Now, your problem SOUNDSvery much like a panic attack. Yet, this is just the internet and nobody can ever derive safe conclusions here. My advice, go for a medical check up that includes blood/urine analysis, and a regular visit to a medical doctor. Explain to the doctor what happened and ask for his/her advice. This will help rule out any organic problem. When a bodily malfunction has been excluded, you can proceed to a mental health specialist. If your problem is indeed an anxiety disorder a psychologist can help you. Be hopeful, and don’t think this is the end of the world. Anxiety disorders are extremely common. They happen to people a lot, regardless of age, gender, status etc. The reason they happen is not the same for everybody because as you understand everybody has a unique combination of genes, experiences, perceptions about the world etc etc. What is known is that some individuals are more vulnerable to certain disorders compared to other individuals. The causes for each person vary, but it is usually a combination of the factors above : experience, genetic vulnerability, perceptual system, and precipitating factors.
One type of therapy that is very effective for the tretment of panic attacks/panic disorder and anxiety disorders in general is Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy. This approach works with thoughts and feelings to make them more realistic, more applicable to reality. It changes a faulty perspective to make it logical. You can find a lot of information on CBT on the internet. My advice is to seek a therapist that practices CBT.
As for the financial problem, you can talk about it with your therapist at the beginning of therapy. Most therapists understand, and can offer their clients alternatives that best suit their needs.
One final word. Don’t get into the trap of telling yourself this will go away on its own-it won’t. Get the help you need on time, the sooner you get it, the less you suffer. Don’t consider yourself crazy or sick. You are neither. You just need to learn how to best control your thoughts so that your body stops responding to false alarms. I know you are scared, and you have a million questions about what this was, and how to make it go away. You will see, as soon as you start working with a professional, you will start feeling better.